Last week I read the article ‘7 Types of Friends, and Which Is Most Essential for Our Happiness’.  Realizing I have friends in each of the 7 categories in the author’s list I wondered how and why each of these made a difference in my life.  The key factor to each is that I feel like I ‘matter’ and I feel like I help others know they ‘matter’.  Even, as the author suggested, “less-intimate friendships may matter more than I thought.”

Below are the friendship types the author explored.

**Lifelong Friends
**Best Friends

**Close Friends
**Social Group Friends
**Activity Friends
**Friends of Convenience
**Acquaintance Friends

“Friendships are a key to our happiness and health. Most people have connections that reflect varying degrees of closeness—and that’s healthy. “There’s value in having a variety of social interactions in the course of your week: This will invite opportunities to engage in different ways with different people, which brings novelty into your life,” explains Degges-White. “Engaging with others and establishing a connection, no matter how seemingly inconsequential, can make a positive difference.”

Do you recognize any of these friendship categories from your own life?

Expanding on the idea of the importance of mattering I found an article ‘People Know They Matter When…’  Maiers discusses the Choose2Matter initiative.  The foundation of the Choose2Matter platform are the following concepts:

**You are enough.

**You have influence.

**You are a genius.

**You have a contribution to make.

**You have a gift that others need.

**You are the change.

**Your actions define your impact.

**You matter.

Understanding that “you” matter and that “you” can make a difference hopefully empowers you to act in others’ lives.

Duckworth’s sketchnote graphically depicts the 9 premises of the Choose2Matter movement (discussed in Maiers’ article).   Think about how each of these connect to the relationships (7 types of friendships) you have with others.

I MATTER…YOU MATTER!!!

Well-being is one of the three concepts of Blooms to Blossoms purpose.  Tanmay Vora’s sketchnote illustrates the Five Ways of well-Being report presented to the Foresight Project. This report communicates the evidence base for improving people’s well-being.

I believe we can all agree with the panel’s definition of well-being as “feeling good” and functioning well.”

A review of the most up-to-date evidence the report suggests that building the following five actions into our day-to-day lives is important for well-being:

Connect…. making connections support and enrich your day

Be Active… in a way that suits your level of mobility and fitness

Take Notice… be aware and reflect on your experiences

Keep Learning… set challenges and take pleasure in achievements

Give… link to the wider community based on your interest and abilities

These five actions are in direct relation to the idea of “integration of wellness, lifelong learning, and personal development” Blooms to Blossoms shares.

Here is a brief video summary of the findings.

“Each of the five ways have been shown to make a positive difference in how we feel and live our lives. How you apply them is up to you but by including these simple actions every day, we can improve our mental health and wellbeing.”

Life is multi-faceted…it would be difficult, if not impossible, to disconnect the physical, mental, emotional, social, and spiritual aspects of life.  There is a relationship of these elements that permeate and integrate with living. For me, physical exercise is a form of spiritual practice that is the catalyst bringing these aspects together.

Movement can be a way to focus on our well-being.  Think about it…exercise is like cross training for life.  The physical aspect of movement is just one of the many outcomes. Movement improves thinking, perspective, and purpose.  When you move you become physically and emotionally healthier. The more you move the more you confident and capable you become.

Dupue (n.d.) provides reasons why he believes fitness is a form of spiritual practice.

You use it for greater happiness and fulfillment.

You use your workouts as a time to reflect.

You face yourself and grow in more ways than physical.

You test your will.

Your heart is engaged.

You expand your comfort zone.

You change your karma.

You release emotion and energy.

You take a moment a breathe.

Your mind quiets down, and you are present.

You have mental or emotional breakthroughs.

Maybe it’s time for you to think about your lifetime hobbies, fitness, and how these experiences have been beneficial to you in the past. Pulling from a classroom assessment strategy, the one-minute paper I’ve listed some questions below to help stimulate your thoughts. A one-minute paper is a short writing task to prompt reflection and is useful in planning.

**Why was the activity important to you in the past?
**In what way is the activity important to you now?
**How has the value of the activity changed over time?  Why?
**How will the activity be a part of your future?
**How has your participation in the activity impacted your life (past and present)?
**How do you expect the activity to contribute to your wellbeing in the future?

NOTE: image from @thepresentpsychologist; content excerpts from previous Blooms to Blossoms blogs

Creativity is the joy of exploration.  Vanlint (2017) supports the idea that being creative can guide learning and critical thinking.  The benefits include:

**the opportunity of freedom (no right or wrong way to be creative),
**the opportunity to be authentic (self-awareness and expression),
**the opportunity to enhance wellness (stress relief, joy, & quality of life),
**the opportunity to problem solve (resourceful solutions).

Curiosity opens the door to creativity.  Asking questions, investigating, and constructing concepts to answer questions through information seeking, data manipulation, and connecting with others all result in new learning experiences.  The heart of a lifelong learner encompasses curiosity and creativity.

Wouter (2018) defines critical thinking, curiosity, and creativity and explains how all three have value but “one without the other” would be a limiting factor in existence.

Critical thinking = assessing/ judging what we know
Curiosity = wondering about alternatives, known and unknown
Creativity = coming up with these alternatives, beyond obvious

• Critical Thinking without Curiosity = eliminates an openness to various perspectives
• Curiosity without Creativity = daydreaming without stopping. We do need an extent of daydreaming but without action there would be no end.
• Creativity without Critical thinking = mindless generation of ideas (solutions) without a context (problem).
• Curiosity without Critical thinking = no thoughtful judgement
• Creativity without Curiosity = generating ideas with no obvious criteria
• Critical thinking without Creativity = lack of embracing various approaches

Your life will blossom through your curiosity and creativity.

Lifelong learning is an ongoing process.  There are different goals and paths each person takes to educate self and build new skills. The ability to adapt, learn, adjust, and share your insights to teach others will keep your body and mind in shape. Personal learning and professional learning contribute to how you experience life. Lifelong learning is an essential part of life resulting in expanding horizons and gaining perspective of self.

“We now accept the fact that learning is a lifelong process of keeping abreast of change. And the most pressing task is to teach people how to learn.”

–Peter Drucker

Real learning involves a systematic exploration.  Below are three aspects of effective learning.

Learning Through Reflection

Reflection is:

**a process of analysis.
** a structured learning activity that gives meaning to the learning process.
** a way to connect with the academic material of the course.
** essential to the learning experience because it is one of the factors that contributes to the quality and the depth of your learning.
**a way to encourage critical thinking.

Gaining personal knowledge of practice (how you live life) requires reflection.  In my first blog, Next Steps for Me & What’s the Point for You I introduce the idea of self-reflection by how York-Barr, et. al (2016) outline how to think about reflection.

Learning by Sharing

As a child we are taught to share.  Through sharing we learn to build relationships and to engage cooperatively with others.  Sharing touches on many wellness components; social, intellectual, emotional.  Sharing knowledge with others helps you grow.  Having a fixed set of skills is what makes you proficient in a specific area – but growth means continuous development. They say you could learn something from everybody in your life (Cherbel, 2015).

Learning as a Community

Learning together or learning as a community connects to the idea in Blanchard’s quote.

“None of us is as smart as all of us.”

Reflection and sharing, as discussed above, are two aspects of effective learning.  Building your shared learning community pulls these pieces together and enhances your personal development.  Ask questions, learn to listen, be open to other perspectives and apply this knowledge to your life.

Vora (2018) expands on the ideas of reflection, sharing, and community in his post On Learning Slowly. To really learn effectively, we need to consume slow media, slowly.  And then reflect upon it. And put it into practice in some way or the other. Blend it with our experience. And then share what we learn with communities that feed us.

“Balance is not better time management, but better boundary management.”

Mindfulness is the awareness that arises from:

**Paying attention

**Being present in the moment

**Focusing on purpose

**Being non-judgmental

**Being curious, warm, kind, and compassionate

Jacobson (n.d.) and Mansukhani (2016)

During summer 2020 I was a member of the Science of Well-Being course.  This course has open enrollment and is free.  The course focuses on increasing personal happiness and building more productive habits. During my participation in the course, I wrote a 3-part blog series Well-Being: Self Exploration (April, May, and June).  I saw the sketchnote I share today in Happiness Lab Facebook Group.  So, my next question as I continue to “explore” is “I wonder what the difference is between work-life balance and mindfulness?”

Ellard (2015) suggests that mindfulness is not better than work-life balance, or the other way around. There is no good, better, best, right, or wrong way to learn skills to achieve this outcome. With both mindfulness and work-life balance, we want the same outcome: easy joy and meaningful engagement with the roles, responsibilities and relationships that make up life – including the relationships we have with ourselves and those with whom we work. Let’s ditch the discussion around the labels and focus instead on creating these environments where we can make the choice for mindful, balanced, integrated life (para 2 & 7).

Being mindful about life balance – is not just about being aware of what is happening around you. It is also about being fully present in the moment. By doing so, you can experience more productivity, a higher quality of life, and improve your well-being.

Are you stuck in a rut?  Do you need a change?  Are you looking for a new goal?  As a lifelong learner you will find that stepping out of your comfort zone can provide many opportunities to improve your wellness and personal development.  Trying new activities, exploring new experiences, and opening yourself to new ideas inspire and teach in a powerful way.  Often the outcome is a fresh perspective, a new sense of purpose, and enhanced relationships.

The potential for growth and reward is often worth the risk and stress of stepping out of your comfort zone. Milton (2019), outlines some tips to step out of your comfort zone and embrace personal growth.

**Start small…identify your goal and determine how you can move forward (step-by-step) to reach the goal

**Release your insecurities…be confident in your abilities to achieve your goal

**Learn for the experience…embrace the process

As you take on the challenge to step out of your comfort zone, you may need to redefine what failure means and understand that personal growth through lifelong learning could be uncomfortable.  Remember….reinventing yourself can be a rewarding process.

Duckworth’s sketchnote depicts Nowik (n.d.) article “10 Things That Will Happen When You Start Stepping Out of Your Comfort Zone.”  Nowik states,

“There’s one priceless feeling you’ll definitely experience provided you embrace discomfort: when people around you start talking about the changes you have made and how you inspired them to do the same. The motivation which comes from that is immeasurable.”

You must do the thing you think you cannot do.  Eleanor Roosevelt

Lifelong learning is a continuous, ongoing, and self-directed pursuit. Challenging the mind can be an effective way of supporting a healthy and active mind, body, and spirit.

Curiosity helps us learn how to ask questions, gain new insight, expand our boundaries, expand our horizons, learn new things, make unexpected connections, and build trusting relationships with others. Curiosity is the basis of everything we do well in life, including personal development.

A key part of lifelong learning involves engaging your senses. Try seeing, hearing, feeling, touch, smell, or taste something, at least once a day. This will help develop your natural curiosity, which will lead you to even more questions, allowing you to be open to new experiences and knowledge. The more you use your senses, the more you will come to know and understand yourself. As your understanding grows, your self-esteem will also grow, allowing you to pursue your personal development goals with more confidence.

A good personal learning initiative begins by asking yourself a series of questions to gain perspective on your learning goals.

**What do you want to learn more about?

**What kind of person do you want to be?

**Who are some people you admire?

**What personal interests do you have?

There is no right or wrong way to approach your lifelong learning…be willing to:

**stretch your comfort zone

**grow through successes and failures

**keep an open mind

**collect information and ideas

**learn to listen to others

Do something that you have been putting off for too long. If you want to learn something new, then you must not hesitate to take advantage of your various resources. Start with your personal curiosity and then build on it as you progress.

“No significant learning happens only through consumption of insights. It happens when we act on what we learn, go through the experience, take risks, and then develop insights through the lens of that experience” (Vora, 2019).

NOTE: Sketchnote Mental Habits that Support Lifelong Learning by Tanmay Vora.
Read his blog post.